Following: a public service announcement regarding people like me, who humbly request your special consideration:
- We are likely to have dirt under our nails. This has nothing to do with how recently we have bathed, and more to do with the fact that we make ourselves presentable, head out the door and then adjust or pat a few plants on the way. Later, in meetings, we glance down at our fingernails in horror. Please don’t judge.
- We appear very creepy in the evenings. After work or life or what have you, we are occasionally compelled to wander out into our yards or recently cultivated spots to admire our work. To add to the crazy effect, some of us like to coddle a glass of wine in the process. This helps us look more delusional to the rest of the world, but in reality it is an essential part of the late night garden perusing and planning.
- We appear very creepy, frankly, at many times. Frequently, I find myself carefully observing a terra cotta pot which probably appears, to the discerning eye, like it has nothing but dirt in it. There are things growing, and I have to check on them. The neighbors are 100{cab58b9493bca9eccefbf3ae00ef5a3add1991efca1fb728a890b19984c3cc67} certain I’m off my rocker, but I’ll keep on staring at my dirt. I’m encouraging.
- We have amnesia. In terms of additional explanation on the point above, sometimes we are staring at those pots because we can’t, if I may be honest, remember if we planted seeds in them or not. This is a conundrum, and we require your sympathy. Just let us look at the dirt.
- We are accosted by a condition known as ring around the heels. Again, please reference the commitment above to bathing. I do, promise – I scrub, shave, soap and scour. Then, I moisturize and put on cute wedges. And again… I attend meetings and glance down, and I’m pretty sure that it appears I walked barefoot through a swamp before the aforementioned meeting, acquiring leeches along the way.
There are so many other things you need to know, but for now I hope you’ll be able to tolerate – nay, embrace – your brothers and sisters with dirt under their nails. We apologize for our ineptitude.
